


Communication's a Bitch

by Sargentpepper23



Series: Justice, Morality, and Revenge [4]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Bickering, F/M, Humor, Revenge, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:28:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27740764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sargentpepper23/pseuds/Sargentpepper23
Summary: “You owe her, commodore.  Big time.”Or in other news,Nox extends an olive branch, Charlotte runs on sugar and spite, and the two get written up by Command for verbally assaulting other marines.
Series: Justice, Morality, and Revenge [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2028793
Kudos: 4





	Communication's a Bitch

_Five hours since Nox’s request_

“Care-Bear, you gonna be alright,” Kiki called softly from the doorway. 

Charlotte waved her off, “I’ll be fine. Just want to get these done before tomorrow,” she murmured distractedly.

The moon was high in the night sky, and the desks were washed in white as it peeked through the tall windows. Even with the natural light, it was Charlotte’s tiny desk lamp that really did the trick. If said woman weren’t so busy analyzing the stack of reports before her, she would have noticed the worried look on her friend’s face. “How many more do you have left”?

The redhead eyed the pile to her left, noticeably taller than the stack on the right, “Twenty-two.”

“… Get out of here soon, ok”?

“Yeah, I will.” _Lie._ “Night.”

The door shut with a click, and in the quiet, Charlotte promised herself she would stay no longer than 2:00am.

~~

_Sixteen hours since Nox’s request_

“Nox asked me to give you your snail back.”

Charlotte accepted the snail from Audra’s outstretched fingers with a yawn, “Thanks, I’m going to need it.”

“… Hey,” Audra said softly, “are you ok”?

Charlotte took a long pull from her drink, “I’m fine. Why”?

The brunette eyed the thick layer of sugar settled at the bottom of her friend’s iced drink, “No reason.”

“Hmmm,” Charlotte stood with a stretch, “tell Nox not to expect any reports from me today.” 

Audra remained seated. It was unusual for Charlotte to leave before finishing her drink. Let alone order two drinks at the same time. "He isn't going to like that."

The woman shrugged and slung a near-bursting duffel bag over her shoulder, “It’s the truth.”

~~

_Two days since Nox’s request_

“I need to speak with Charlotte.”

“Sorry, Commodore, but that’s not possible at the moment. She’s… busy.”

Nox could have sworn a woman was yelling in the background of the call. “Tell her to give me a call when she has time, please.”

The man on the other end snorted, “Yeah, sure. That won’t be any time soon.” _Click!_

~~

_Four days since Nox’s request_

The office was quiet, unusually so, but Charlotte didn’t register that. 

No, she was too busy ripping some dickwad a new asshole two thousand miles away.

“Listen up. I don’t give a shit if it’s four o'clock your time. You’re on the clock for another hour. So, _get your ass_ down to the file room and fax over everything you have on the Kid Pirates, _now_. No— don’t make up excuses. You’ve blown me off three times now, and I swear if you go for a fourth, I’m going to sail over there and personally shove my foot up your ass.” 

The man blubbered something, but Charlotte didn’t care, “Fax them, now”! _Click!_

She set the snail back with the others, only for another one to start chirping. She ignored it because someone dared clear their throat, albeit quietly, at her. “Yes,” she drawled.

Nox eyed her like one would a bomb, “That’s quite a collection you have there,” he nodded down at her desk.

Charlotte cocked a single brow at him. He’s one to judge. She’s seen his desk at its worst, including the mountain of coffee cups spilling out of his trashcan. Her cups just tend to line the edge of her desk like a barricade.

Another snail started chirping. “Did you need something, Commodore,” she asked with a hint of teeth.

His gaze flicked to her snails, the half-finished reports blanketing her desk, and back at her, “I’ll speak with you later.”

She was answering the second snail by the time he reached the door.

~~

_One week since Nox’s request_

“Where’s Charlotte,” Nox asked the pinkette in front of him, “I haven’t seen her in three days.” 

The intelligence officer lounging at her desk continued filing her stiletto nails. “Hiding, from you.”

“I never thought her a coward.”

The curvy woman inspected her nails one final time before raking her gaze down his form-fitting vest, “She isn’t, but you’re… distracting.”

Nox frowned at her tone. “Relax, Commodore. I don’t bite, but Charlotte does,” she finished with a wink. 

Nox’s finger twitched, and he crossed his arms to hide it. He refused to name _why_ it started tapping. “Where’s Charlotte, Kiki? I need to know—“

“She’s busy, _very_ busy, no thanks to you. Actually,” she leaned forward in her chair, the final rays of sunset warming her caramel skin, “do you know what you’ve asked of her? The ridiculous amount of bullshit she’s wading through to get you those files”?

“I asked her for everything the navy has on the Kid pirates, which shouldn’t be that difficult seeing that she can get copies from HQ.”

Kiki scoffed, “Only lazy, incompetent officers request info from there. Their reports are intentionally vague and filled with errors.”

“That doesn’t make any sense. Why would the reports be-? Oh.” 

The answer hit him like the steel beam that broke his collarbone all those months ago did. He’s an idiot. Why didn’t he think of that?

“You’re right. All incident reports must be submitted to HQ. However, there is no rule dictating what they must entail. Most of the bad reports are filled out by lazy officers, but others…”

Kiki didn’t need to spell it out for him. He knows the navy has a corruption problem. And if Charlotte isn’t getting her information from HQ, then…

The puzzle pieces fell into place, and Nox finally caught a glimpse of the big picture. _Oh shit, Charlotte’s really…_

“There’s a reason why it takes her so long to gather the information for your bounties. It’s harder to hide the evidence when you go straight to the source. When you request physical copies of first-hand accounts and transponder shells.”

“So, she’s…”

“Yeah. She’s calling every single base that could have possibly come into contact with them.”

_They’re originally from the South Blue, but they’ve made it this far into the New World; sinking ships left and right, raiding island after island, recruiting men from all over…_

It made sense now; why she had no reports to give him, the army of transponder snails on her desk, the dark bags under her eyes, noticeable even under her makeup. 

_Shit._

The sheer amount of information she was surely going through, consolidating into individual profiles of Eustass Kid’s band of wacko’s…

Kiki pointed her nail file at him, “You owe her, commodore. Big time.”

~~

The words on the reports were blurring together, the side of her hand was stained black, and her snails stopped ringing hours ago, signaling the end of a workday. It was time to call it quits.

Charlotte pushed the papers away and pressed her cheek into the cool wood of her desk. It was so warm, so quiet in her hidden office. If she didn’t already know her neck would hurt like a bitch in the morning, she’d fall asleep in this exact spot. 

She eyed the messy futon in the adjoining room, much too far away for her heavy limbs, as well as the black fabric of her sweatpants sticking out from her overnight bag next to it. Fuck. There’s no way around it. She’d have to grab more clothes tomorrow. 

Still, as she set her alarm and somehow managed to make it under the futon’s warm covers, she remembered. That was a problem for tomorrow.

~~

_Eight days since Nox’s demand_

Nox frowned down at the wrinkled slip of paper in his hand. Audra’s abbreviations make no sense, and as he finally made it up to the counter, he hoped the barista would be able to decipher the scribbles.

“What can I get ya,” asked the bored woman.

“Uhhhh” Nox squinted at the scribbles before handing it over in defeat, "Whatever this is, please."

The barista gave him an unimpressed look and popped the cap off her marker to draw the same symbols on a massive cup. “One Charlie Horse,” she called to the mountain of a man mixing drinks behind her.

_Charlie Horse?_

The man didn’t even turn when he said, “Ask her if she wants extra syrup this time.”

“Do you want extra syrup, Hon”?

Nox looked to the slip again for instructions, ones he most certainly could not read. “I’m not… sure,” he said slowly.

The barista sighed. “He says he doesn’t know,” she called loudly.

“He, what do you mean, _he”_?

The drink master marched over to the counter, "Hey buddy, this is for Charlotte, right? Why are you getting her a drink," he asked accusingly like a protective father would upon meeting their daughter’s first boyfriend.

Nox respected the steely look in the bald man’s eye. It wasn’t often people confronted someone of his rank. Nobody wanted to chance the possible repercussions that would follow, especially with that nasty rumor going around that he eats people for breakfast.

It was one time, and he threw up for three days afterward.

“I asked for her help on a project, and it turned out to be more difficult than I imagined. Thought this would be a nice pick-me-up.”

The man scrutinized the slip, then him. “This is Lieutenant Audra’s handwriting. I’m assuming you’re Commodore Nox”?

“And if I am”?

The two regarded one another before a craggy smile lit up the man’s face, “She speaks highly of you. One Charlie Horse coming right up.”

Nox paid for the drink, and when the man, Cal, _not_ Calvin, handed over a garish pink concoction and a large cup of coffee on the house, Nox finally asked, “Why Charlie Horse”?

“Have you ever met Charlotte,” Cal asked with a knowing grin. 

Fair. She’s a pain, but she’s not harmless. Not with that gun tucked into the small of her back. 

“Thanks for the drink. I’ll be back tomorrow.”

“Hmmm. We’ll see.”

~~

There was a dull knock at the conference room door, but at that moment, Charlotte couldn’t be bothered to answer it. The base she had been waiting on _finally_ faxed over the last of their files, and she had thirteen more profiles to get through before moving on to the next stack of reports. 

Unbothered by her lack of manners, whoever was out there kicked the door shut behind them before making their way towards the messy conference table. 

Her pen creaked in her grip, but she continued writing. She reserved this room fair and square, printer included, and if the fucker has a problem with that, she’d gladly take them to the mat over it. 

Instead of a brash, intruding hand, a drink, _her_ drink, was set considerately out of the way. “I heard this is what you like to drink.”

Charlotte frowned. Her pen stopped moving. She knows that voice. 

Sure enough, when she peered up, Nox was looking at her expectantly. “Is it poisoned,” she asked half-seriously, reaching for it with greedy fingers.

He rolled his eyes and drew up a chair next to her, “No. There are cheaper ways to do away with you.”

Good point. Why waste beli on poison or a bullet when you have teeth and claws. “Why are you here, Nox? I don’t have any reports for you.”

He opened the lid of his coffee and poured no less than ten packets of sugar into it. Jesus. Guess she’s not the only one with a sweet tooth. “I know. Just thought you’d want this.”

She did want it. _Bad_. She took a long pull from the straw, and _oh thank God, Cal put extra syrup in here._

Her moment of bliss was ruined when the printer in the corner whirred to life, and just as it had all day, spat her fresh documents across the tray and onto the floor. Fuck.

Charlotte clicked her pen closed, but Nox was already out of his seat, motioning for her to stay put. “I got it. Take a break.”

She went back to writing, all while draining her drink dry like a camel does a water well, "I will in a bit. Just need to add three more reports to this profile, and it will be done."

Nox snatched the pen from her grasp and ignored her outraged hiss when he tucked it inside his jacket. “Break first,” he said as he moved the reports away and then had the fucking gall to pop his boots up in the newly opened spot.

She picked up his feet and dropped them out of her way, only for him to slide them back. “Why are you here, Nox,” she asked through gritted teeth, shoving his feet again.

He flipped open a report, and she yelped more in surprise than in pain when he planted his heel on the back of her hand, “Just wanted to see how my favorite intelligence officer was doing.”

Charlotte wanted to smack him. “I was doing fine until some overgrown lizard barged his way in here, and—“

“Brought you a drink, treated you to some company, and is now offering to help you with this paperwork. Jeez, what more do you want?” He looked over the report at her. “Us overgrown lizards can only do so much, you know”?

She had some questions in parts to him helping, but first…

“Can you really turn into a dinosaur”?

Nox blinked, only to flash a toothy grin, “Yeah, I can. Wanna see,"?

She did, but he didn’t need to know that. Instead, she made a show of thinking about it before looking him over with a frown. “Nah. At first, I was excited to hear you’re somehow related to the velociraptor. Then I discovered they were only the size of turkeys. Being from the same family, I’m sure you won’t live up to my expectations either.”

Nox simply smiled wider, and the familiar tapping of his finger filled the room. “I’ve been told I’m bigger than most.”

“Size isn’t everything, sweetie. Now,” she plucked the report from his hand and set it back where it belonged, “what were you saying earlier about helping me”?

An emotion flickered across his face, and his smile melted into a firm line as he said with up-most sincerity, “I want to help you with this,” he gestured to the sprawl of reports littering the table, eyes narrowing at one profile in particular. “This is a lot, even for you.”

She went to interrupt, to tell him she’s _fine_ , but he continued. “I didn’t realize how much time and effort went into making these profiles, and I’m sorry for dumping this project on you. It's… it's ridiculous, really, the hoops you have to jump through to get me everything.” 

His finger clicked faster now, and he slid his boots off the table to face her square on. “I know we don’t always get along, but I need your help. I just… I _have_ to catch them.”

The utter seriousness of his body language, the slightest hint of a plea in his tone, she wouldn’t refuse his request. No, not when she wanted to see the pirates rot for what they have done. Past and present. 

She would never forget it; Her pen hitting the floor, Nox’s chair arm snapping beneath clenched fingers, followed by the commodore’s clipped questions after a pale-faced officer informed the pair of an incident. An incident where the Kid pirates had raped, tortured, and murdered a squad of female marines, commander included, several weeks ago. 

Charlotte knew that commander. Had written reports for her in the past and reminded her monthly that _‘yes, you need to water your cactus’_ whenever she spied the half-dead plant. Had fought the holiday crowds last year to buy _the_ Supreme Robot Champion for her son when her deployment was extended.

It had taken her two days to crack open the report in her other office. Where no one would see her tears as she read through the autopsy findings and studied the pictures of their bodies. Where she, yet again, noted the odd symbol carved into the inner thighs of some of them. Three this time, a grisly signature popping up with increasing frequency. 

Charlotte met Nox’s gaze. Saw the same violence and icy wrath that had burned in her red-rimmed eyes three weeks ago. When she stood in front of her mirror, screaming her rage and sorrow into her hands.

Yeah. This is personal. 

She tossed a snail into his lap, “Call this base and ask to speak with Jensen. He’s dragging his heels, and I think a Commodore’s persuasion will speed up the process.”

~~

That day, two assholes got to work and managed to complete four profiles.

And the printer? The one that continued to spill paper all over the floor? The one Nox swore he was going to throw out a window after this?

It needed to be refilled twice. 

**Author's Note:**

> This is all I have for now folks! I'll post more if/when motivation strikes me :)


End file.
